A Fan Letter to Andy Cohen

Nope, I have never ever sent a fan letter to anyone; not even my teenage musical love Boyz II Men. Today I did it! However, it wasn't to a singer, actor, or sports image. It was to the affable BRAVO TV executive Andy Cohen, who I have NOTHING in common with except being from Missouri. However he absolutely cracks my shit up with his memoir Most Talkative and his nightly show Watch What Happens Live. Where I literally just watched him try to pair up the NKOTB member to a crouch shot in an On Air game. Most importantly, he is the creator of the very prestigious TV series The Real Housewives of ---------. Andy's smile reminds life is just too short not to laugh and have fun with your surroundings. So here is my first attempt at written adoration (now I do realize he may never get my email or letter):



Andy,

 

I wanted to say thank you for your candor and humor on air and mostly in your book. This Kansas City mom has had a series of unfortunate events the past 3 years. 2 bouts of meningitis, 4 brain surgeries, and a slew of hospital visits have kept me from trolling Target and texting in the school pick-line with other "at home" moms. However, I have been able to adopt a Cohensque comical and sometimes inappropriate view of the whole ordeal. My funny and crass rose-colored glasses were influenced by Most Talkative and how you handled your own life struggles, which have zero relationship to my Catholic, vanilla, and Midwestern problems. You dealt with your sexuality; I dealt with a colorful neurosurgeon who I believe has severe ADHD. You dealt with prejudice; I dealt with shunts (yeah...inappropriate word huh?) You dealt with a Jew fro; I dealt with an unruly patch of shaved hair I named Walter. My odd story propelled me to create an immaturely prepared blog where I could share my improper thoughts (http://clusterofcrap.blogspot.com). And this outlet has been my biggest deterrent from depression; I can't afford a new face like Vicki. Thank you for being transparent and yourself and letting the world love you for who you are! I have gleaned so much from your public narrative!

 

Now I know you said there will never be a RHoSTL(or KC) because Midwestern women are not cray-cray like those in OC or ATL. However, if you want a wholesome Missourian to be a bartender in the clubhouse one night, I will happily ditch my addiction to Old Navy clothes and go get a fancy dress at Macy's ;)

 

Thanks,

April Farmer